Trust: The Heart of Connection in Dementia Care
- Maureen Braen
- May 23, 2025
- 4 min read
We often talk about trust in broad terms, but when it comes to dementia care, trust isn’t just a word—it’s the foundation. It's what makes a person feel safe, seen, and valued, even as their abilities change. Without trust, connection falters. With it, relationships deepen, stress lessens, and a sense of belonging emerges, not just for the person living with dementia, but for families, care partners, and teams.
Dr. Brené Brown reminds us, “Trust is built in the smallest of moments.” And those moments matter deeply when memory shifts, confusion sets in, or a familiar face feels unfamiliar. Trust becomes the anchor.
What is trust, really?
Trust is the belief that someone has your best interest at heart. It’s the quiet knowing that you’re not alone, that your dignity will be protected, and your voice still matters. In dementia care, this means honoring choices, even small ones, like what to wear, what to eat, when to rest. It means speaking with, not at. Doing with, not for.
Trust is not transactional. It can’t be achieved through checklists or tasks. It’s relational. It’s the result of consistent presence, tone, gestures, and care that affirm, “You matter to me.”
Why trust matters—especially in dementia care
When we create environments where trust thrives, people feel safer. They may feel less anxious, less distressed. They may need fewer medications prescribed to manage behaviors that stem from unmet needs. When there is trust, the need for surveillance tools like cameras may diminish—because families and residents feel secure in the culture of the community.
This goes beyond the individual. It’s the heart of a healthy care culture. Trust shapes the tone of the entire community. It impacts how team members interact, how families engage, how residents connect. It's not just a goal; it’s the ground everything else grows from.
Trust is created through:
Consistent presence
Familiarity builds comfort. Being there, day after day, allows trust to grow organically. The smile that says, “I know you” and the voice that says “I’m here” begins to root.
Clear and respectful communication
Speak with compassion and patience. Use gestures, tone, and validation to convey understanding. Even when words fade, people feel your presence.
Honoring autonomy and choice
Trust builds when we invite people into decisions, no matter how small. Rather than choosing a person's outfit, ask if they would like to wear the blouse or sweater today. Choice affirms dignity.
Fostering remaining skills
Help people do what they still can. We often take over too much, too soon. Doing so sends a subtle message that they are no longer capable. Instead, support strengths. Compensate for losses without overshadowing what remains.
Consistency across the team
Trust isn’t built by one person alone. It must be mirrored by everyone in the community—housekeeping, nursing, activities, dining. Culture is created moment by moment, by every interaction.
How trust shows up in action:
Pausing to offer a hand, not rush the task
Validating a feeling before redirecting
Asking permission before entering a space
Offering options rather than instructions
Using quiet presence when words aren’t needed
Giving time, space, and grace
Speaking in the same tone you’d want someone to use with your own parent
Trust in community culture
In a memory care setting or assisted living community, trust is the soil from which everything else grows. Residents trust the team. Team members trust each other. Families trust that their loved ones are known and valued. When this is missing, anxiety fills the gap. Oversight increases. Mistrust grows. But when trust is nurtured, a true sense of community emerges.
And this is where we can begin to reframe what “safety” really means. It’s not about keeping people in a protective bubble. Safety is emotional. Safety is knowing you belong.
When trust is present…
The person living with dementia may feel more at ease and may show fewer signs of distress
Families are less likely to request cameras or constant updates because they feel confident in the care
Team members feel empowered, supported, and connected
The need for medications often used in response to unmet needs may decrease because emotional needs are being met in non-pharmacological ways
Strategies to build and reinforce trust:
Use visual schedules and consistent routines to offer predictability
Display familiar objects and photos to cue recognition
Offer choices visually or with cues when words are hard to follow
Create a calm, sensory-friendly environment with natural light, soft music, and gentle touch
Practice deep listening, respond to emotion more than words
Follow the person’s lead, their rhythm, their pace
Trust isn’t something we can demand—it’s something we earn, daily, through how we show up. It’s in our tone, our timing, our patience, and our intention. And when it’s there, it changes everything.
In the words of Jean Watson, nurse theorist and founder of the Caring Science movement, “Caring is the essence of nursing.” I’d go one step further: Trust is the essence of caring.
Lead with trust. Model it in every interaction—with our teams, our families, our communities, and most of all, with those living with dementia. Because when trust leads the way, connection follows—and from connection comes comfort, meaning, and joy.
Looking for support? Reach out. Let’s navigate this together.
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